Friday, November 14, 2014

Article Number: 9883


* An Unknown Human Being *

* Presents *

* *

* "How To Rip Off The Fucking Cable Compnay" *

* An Informational Text File From *

* The Burnt Brain Society *

* Screwing You Up Since 1991 *



What You Need:

A Video Cassette Recorder (VCR)



Press REC on your VCR "BEFORE" you call the Pay-Per-View company and record all

the way until the movie starts!

NOTE: You are going to have to pay for the movie the first time you do it, but

after you paid that one time you'll never have to pay again!

Ok, Got It So Far? All you do is record whatever happens until the movie

starts. Then take out the tape and label it "Cable Blast". Simple enough huh?

Well, then when you want to get a movie on Pay-Per-View..but you dont want to

pay simply go to your VCR and do this:

Turn the VCR around so the back of it is facing you. You should see four holes

(two for "Input" and two for "Output"). Ok, now here comes the good part! Take

the cable from the "input" slot and put it in the "output" slot. Then take the

cable that is going from the "output" slot and put it in the "input" slot of

the cable box! Now put your "Cable Blast" tape in the VCR (make sure you re-

wound it!) and put the cable box on the Pay-Per-View channel. Now play the

fucking tape and you've got Pay-Per-View!


How It Works:

You see, when you call the cable company, it sends a Signal Shock (Or Blast)

to your cable box, only your cable box will reconize a paticular blast. This

turns on and off a switch saying if/if not you can watch pay per view. You

are simply recording the 'Blast' or Signal Shock on your vcr and revercing the

input with output to the cable box so the VCR is actually telling the cable

box to turn that paticualr channel. EASY? Well, this can be done only to a

PBX accessable box, so if you don't have that modern convience, tuff shit!

You can also do this with HBO (Home Box Office), or any other premium channal

supported by your cable company.. Here's what to do.. Call up HBO and ask them

if you need to send your cable box in to get HBO (or any other channel), if

they say that they can do it right there without you sending in your box then

run over to your VCR and hit REC (Yes once more) and record the "Blast" they

send you.. but make sure you tell them to do it now cus' it is showing

something you can't miss! After you get the blast turn off the VCR and call

with a lower voice saying that your son/daughter ordered it and wasn't

supposed to. Then do that thing with the wires and shit (again!), and now you

have the channel for free, or when you call the cable company back to cancel the

order, diconnect the cable box for about two days to be sure, reconnect it, and

then you're in buisness!


Oh Yeah, don't forget to make sure that the cable box is on the channel they

tell you, before you press REC, when ordering HBO (or any other station!)


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